Today has been especially hard. One year ago, 365 days ago, my missionary returned from his mission. I can remember that day clearly. I was at a camp for work and I was in a daze. I couldnt believe that 200 miles away my missionary was flying into John Wayne Airport where all of his family would be waiting, and I wouldnt be. (I wasnt there because I wasnt allowed, not because I was at work.) For the 2 years prior to that, I dreamed of that day forever. I literally had dreams about it. How would I feel? Would I cry? Would I get a hug? Would I run to him? I loved dreaming up the different scenarios. But at the end of the day, NONE of that would ever become a reality.
I used to think that I would never have true closure from his mission. I saw him off, but would NEVER be able to get this day back. Even a year later I feel upset that I wasnt able to be there.
Now, a whole year has gone by. Things are nowhere near what I thought they would be, and for that, I am very sad.
When do you know when to let go?
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
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